overheard in pittsburgh...

this morning, carson and i got breakfast in regent square. there was a group of adolescents at a table near us, ranging in age from what i'd estimate to be 8 to 13 (although i'm really bad at guessing the ages of children). the kids all seemed to be related (cousins perhaps) and some of them were british.

these kids all roll in, climb into seats around the table, the waitress hands them menus and takes their drink orders (they ordered juices and diet cokes) and they begin to discuss their food options. the oldest of this crew was one of the brits. he had the kind of really big curly hair that seventh grade boys have these days and one of those awkward-featured faces that seventh grade boys have had for all time. he declared, in his pubescent-british accent and in a louder-than-necessary tone, "by order of the eldest child, there will be NO french fries!" he made this statement no fewer than four times.

not even needing to eavesdrop, i learned that these kids were going to kennywood later and they were obsessive about low-fat foods. and when the waitress came back to take their orders, the eldest-child-qua-monarch forbade them from going with the homefries option, too, because homefries are just as unhealthy as french fries.

now, i'll admit to being more-full-than-usual of the rage lately. i blame the dear bar examiners. but i was a wee bit annoyed by this table of kids. sure, i applaud their very un-american focus on eating healthy food, especially without adult supervision, but if i were a skinny kid and my cousins-from-another-country started imposing rules about what i could and couldn't order by virtue of being older than me, i would have had a thing or two to say about it.

but, ah the "by order of the eldest child..." bit. awesome! there were many giggles had at my table at the thought of all british children being enamored of ideas of birthright and inherited sovereignty and absolutist decrees and stuff. oh yes, your highness, there will be no french fries!

viva la revolution! generalizations are fun!