...could make "death proof"
, quentin tarantino's segment of _grindhouse
_, worth watching.
wow. i mean, wow. what a craptastic movie! so, the story is that there are these hot women in tight t-shirts and tiny short shorts who drive around in texas and get high and tease boys and drop the f-bomb in every sentence and talk like guys in the proverbial locker room and eventually kurt russell kills some of them and tries to kill the others but then they kill him in the end. OMG BORING!!! soooooo boring!
carson and i had nothing to do last night, and we both think kurt russell is pretty fantastic (come on -- "overboard
"??? "big trouble in little china
"?!? yes!), so we decided to watch "death proof." but then we got exceptionally bored by way too much stupid boring dialogue. to the point where we were making exasperated sighs and in general acting like impatient little kids because we were totally annoyed with the movie. i'm sorry, but who told tarantino that people want to watch 20 minute scenes during which four boring characters talk about boring stuff that is not only painfully boring, but isn't even remotely funny or educational? (if tarantino were my friend, i'd say to him, "quentin, you've truly outdone yourself this time, you arrogant, pointy-chinned prick.")
and then, when things finally get unboring and kurt russell is trying to kill the girls for being so freaking uninteresting, and then the girls fight back and go after kurt russell, it gets totally lame AGAIN because after being a murderous crazy asshole for the whole movie, suddenly kurt russell is all "i'm so sorry! i'm so sorry! i didn't mean anything!" um, what?!?
here's what really gets me, though: people have referred to this movie as "feminist." maybe i've been reading all the wrong stuff, but i didn't realize that "feminism" was nothing more than women talking about their sex conquests and giving lap dances as a means of empowerment and driving fast musclecars and violently beating the crap out of the bad guy at the end. uh, what? sorry, folks. you don't make something "feminist" by casting sexy, leggy women in roles typically reserved for men.
long story short, "death proof" is a colossal waste.
but "planet terror", the robert rodriquez part of _grindhouse_, is pretty damn entertaining and a good time. and federico from "six feet under
" is in it, too!