important lessons from today's ethics class...

it was a banner day in "law and the ethics of lawyering" today! i won't bore anybody with the details, but here's the gist of what we learned:

1. don't have sex with your clients
2. don't have sex with opposing counsel*
3. there are no real professional constraints on class action lawyers
4. government attorneys are analogous to in-house corporate counsel
5. perjury is real and you can lose your license for sitting next to it (or sleeping with it)

here's a quote for those of you who may be taking notes on this stuff:
"the real reason why i think having sex with clients is unprofessional is analogous to the reason why i think sex between teachers and students is unprofessional. because not in every case, but as a general matter, there is a hierarchical dominant relationship that must make suspect the student's or client's acquiescence in that relationship. that should be enough that the lawyer should have as a personal rule that this is not what they do."

there you go. words to live by.


*we didn't discuss what happens if your client has sex with opposing counsel, but i think it's safe to say that we should strongly advise against that.