odds and ends...

first of all, believe it or not, friends, i don't enjoy being a pain in the arse. so when i have to keep calling my neuro's office to try and get some questions answered, i feel like a jackass about it. but hey, it's been a WEEK since el seizuro and i still haven't talked to my doc. that seems a little... unprofessional? irresponsible? unnerving?

second of all, dried cranberries on ANYTHING are my new favorite food. sandwiches, salads, pasta, grains. try it! you'll like it!

third of all, i'm wondering if maybe my daily intake of my little grey and blue friend carbatrol may be too high. my sources tell me that i'm on the normal adult dosage, but it seems odd that i'm still feeling so bizarre. maybe i'm still adjusting? i'd just like the twitches and the shakes and the jerks and the confusion to go away.

fourth of all, holy effed up dreams! last night i dreamt that i couldn't type simple numbers into a calculator -- i lacked the manual dexterity and the brain-to-hand communicationability. it was rather frustrating. and the night before i dreamt that i lived in a ramshackle house that was falling apart all around me, yet i kept finding secret rooms with amazing treasures. awww, kinda like my body! um, ew?

and fifth of all, i've come to a sobering realization. this is hard for me to put up here, but i'm a strong woman and i can do this. so... i've realized... that... it is not my purpose to be the star wars trivial pursuit champion. i'm the girl who owns the game so others can prove how nerdy they are. but i am never to be victorious. like, ever. and this makes me sad. but i have other strengths, right? like, i have pretty eyes and nice hair. and i'm funny. i have a spectacular sense of humor. yeah. good enough/smart enough/doggone it people like me.

over and out.