more tests, more waiting...

my neurologist is pretty keen on this MS idea. it was her first thought when she looked at my MRI films, and even though my symptoms aren't consistent with those of multiple sclerosis, i think she's leaning towards that as a viable diagnosis. but she, just like the neurosurgeon i saw this morning, says that we need to do more tests, that we don't know enough yet to decide what to do.

multiple sclerosis? holy crap. now i've gone from bad to worse. i go from kill-me-quick deadly tumor to won't-kill-me-but-i'll-wish-it-did lifelong debilitating illness.

i don't know anything yet. i shouldn't get ahead of myself. i do know, though, that the inside of my left elbow, where the phlebotomist took blood today, hurts like god almighty. nothing like having your innards searched with a giant needle until the blood starts flowing.

and i thought 2003 was bad... i shudder to think what 2005 will bring.