seeing red...

there are some things one just doesn't do in a grocery store on a saturday afternoon. for example, one should never wander around aimlessly looking for inspiration for some sort of red food item to bring to a party that starts in a few hours.

yet, never let it be said that emily is one to play by the rules. because wander around aimlessly i did!

certain physical spaces bring out the self-absorbed asshole in all of us. for example, airport terminals, new york city, the beltway around D.C., grocery stores. sure, i'm guilty of being a grocery store jerk, too. typically, one goes to the grocery store with a plan, one's focus is on the contents of the shelves and not on the other shoppers. this means that eye contact is not made, "excuse me" is not said, general pleasantries are dispensed with. but when you're wandering around aimlessly looking for inspiration for some sort of red food item to bring to a party? then you get to pay a little more attention to the whole grocery shopping experience. and it's rather amusing, in a the-world-is-way-fucked-up sort of way.

say what you will about the south, but the people there really are friendly. after growing up in the south, i spent four years in the midwest and people there really are friendly, too. then i moved to boston, where the people are the opposite of friendly. and from there i lived in philly, where the people can be downright rude. you can take the girl out of the south, but you can't take the south out of the girl, i guess, because i still expect that people are going to smile when i smile at them or show a little bit of courtesy to fellow human beings. um, not so much, i suppose. it's too bad, really.

sigh...

but the reason i needed something red was that i'm going to a girly party tonight. it's a red party. this means we have to wear something red and bring some sort of food item that's red. no boys are allowed. but when it comes to theme parties like this, i suffer from the same sort of social paralysis that haunts me in the weeks prior to halloween if i have a friend who is throwing a costume party -- every bit of imagination gets zapped from my brain, and yet i create this pressure to be creative and magnificent. it's silly really, because nobody gives a shit*.

so i aimlessly wandered through the aisles in the grocery store searching for red stuff. tomatoes are red. lobsters are red. marinara sauce is red. twizzlers are red. beets are red. ketchup is red. bagel bites are red. yeah. no inspiration. nowhere. what complicates matters is that i didn't allow myself the time to actually prepare anything because i have to go to dinner with some folks at 6:00 and the girly party starts at 8:00. so, once my aimlessness started to become a bit of a hassle, i admitted defeat. inspiration be damned, says i! what did i buy? chips and salsa.

but the chips are red, okay?

boooooooo for emily. boo hiss!

*or, NGAS for short